Wednesday, November 2, 2011

The Dark Lord: Raising the Dead?

One issue that I had declined to blog about in the past was an accusation a while back about the City Council race in District 2. It had been reported to me that certain candidates were cheating. Certain candidates were -- allegedly -- using political party cronies to round up vote-by-mail ballots from the aged, feeble, or infirm at retirement/convalescent hospitals. They were marking them for their candidate and mailing them in. The low-budget candidates in this race did not have the staff or the financial resources to pull off this cunning and devious political power play.

I never got any hard facts from the people reporting this...but the post-election voter data shows too many statistical improbabilities for this to be an urban legend. A source who worked on one of the campaigns remembers looking at the voter data list months later and noticing that certain voters that were over 90 years old... who hadn't voted in multiple years...suddenly getting interested in voting in an obscure City Council race involving two big money spenders like The Dark Lord (Paul Krekorian) and The Beverly Hills Carpetbagger (Christine Essel).

One of the ladies who voted by mail was 103 years old.

Did she really break her multiple-year non-voting pattern to bust out a vote for Zuma Dogg?


Occams razor is the theory that the simplest explanation is most likely the correct one.

It is my theory that The Dark Lord, assisted by his willing minions in the Los Angeles Democratic Party, is the only person who had the money and political connections necessary to pull of this Machiavellian power move.

I would prefer to think that this was the explanation. That Paul Krekorian cheated in the election.

The other possible option? It is nearly unthinkable:

Don't think that I haven't noticed the similarities between Democrats and zombies.

But to honestly think that The Dark Lord had now obtained the mystical power to raise the dead? And to get them to vote Democratic?

Chilling. I shudder to even think of the implications.

He would never lose another election....